Help for Donor Families
Family members of donors are special to Gift of Life so we work hard to support and help you during your grieving process and beyond. We offer follow-up resources in an attempt to meet your needs and provide opportunities for volunteering.
The Michigan Donor Family Advisory Council donated a bench to honor organ, eye and tissue donors statewide.
It was placed in the memorial garden at our Ann Arbor headquarters.
For more information about services for families
Please e-mail Penny Colthurst, Gift of Life’s donor family liaison, or call her at 734.922.1240.
Penny has been working with donor families for 20 years and is dedicated to meeting your needs.
Many donor families want to reach out to their loved one’s recipient or recipients. Some want to meet them in person and share bits of information about the donor. For many, learning that their loved one’s organs, eyes or tissue changed or saved a life is extremely validating and can help with grief and provide a sense of hope.We highly encourage contact between donor families and their recipients, who might want to say thank you but are reluctant to reach out on their own. This can be done at any time after the transplant has taken place.
Because of patient confidentiality laws, the first step in the process involves writing a note or letter that Gift of Life will deliver on your behalf. If the recipient wishes to have future contact, he or she will respond through Gift of Life.
To meet your recipients, we ask that you’ve first established some contact through correspondence, then both of you must complete an authorization form. To receive a copy of this form, e-mail Jean Frey.
If you aren’t sure what to say, send a simple “thinking of you” card, ask them how they’re doing and wait for a response.
Share the story of your loved one and feel free to give general information about occupations, interests, etc. Don’t include any identifying information, such as your last name, city, employer or name of the hospital where your family member donated.
On a separate piece of paper, list your full name, your loved one’s name, address and phone number. This will enable Gift of Life staff to pass your correspondence on to your family member’s recipients.
Mail your correspondence to:
Gift of Life Michigan
c/o Jean Frey
3861 Research Park Drive
Ann Arbor, MI 48108
Support groups and reading materials:
The shorter, cast-iron marker is $15. The larger, white one stands three feet tall and is $30. Both are heavy so shipping is $20. If you're interested in ordering one, email Jeanette.
The Michigan Donor Family Advisory Council donated a bench to honor organ, eye and tissue donors statewide.
It was placed in the memorial garden at our Ann Arbor headquarters.
What we offer includes:
- An opportunity to create a quilt square to honor your family member. Each original patch will be used to make one of dozens of donor quilts displayed at events and memorials statewide to spread the message of organ donation. > View the quilts and read donor stories.
- A Donate Life logo for use with published obituaries and funeral materials.
- An opportunity to become involved with the Michigan Donor Family Council, a support system for family members of organ and tissue donors.
- Memorial or other contributions to the Michigan Donor Family Council should be sent to: Michigan Donor Family Council, c/o Barbara Gerber, 250 Helen, Trenton, MI 48183. Contribution envelopes are available upon request. For envelope requests e-mail Penny Colthurst or Joseph Auker.
- Donor families will be invited to an annual ceremony for the past year’s donors that includes a memorial photo slide show. Each donor’s name also is read to honor them personally.
- A newsletter that publishes three times a year is a place to share your stories and keep you updated on events and programs.
- A book, "The Next Place," upon request.
- A brochure called When Your Loved One Dies answers questions about organ and tissue donation and the donation process.
- Rose planting ceremonies at hospitals across the state to honor donors and their families.
- An opportunity to serve as a liaison to the Donor Family Advisory Committee, which acts as an advocacy arm of Gift of Life Michigan. The committee was created in 1992 by six donor families who worked with Gift of Life to help provide support for other donor families and promote awareness. The group today has a broad spectrum of families of organ, eye and tissue donors.
- Information and resources regarding the Transplant Games, held in a different city every other year.
For more information about services for families
Please e-mail Penny Colthurst, Gift of Life’s donor family liaison, or call her at 734.922.1240.
Penny has been working with donor families for 20 years and is dedicated to meeting your needs.
Writing to your loved one’s recipients:
Many donor families want to reach out to their loved one’s recipient or recipients. Some want to meet them in person and share bits of information about the donor. For many, learning that their loved one’s organs, eyes or tissue changed or saved a life is extremely validating and can help with grief and provide a sense of hope.We highly encourage contact between donor families and their recipients, who might want to say thank you but are reluctant to reach out on their own. This can be done at any time after the transplant has taken place.Because of patient confidentiality laws, the first step in the process involves writing a note or letter that Gift of Life will deliver on your behalf. If the recipient wishes to have future contact, he or she will respond through Gift of Life.
To meet your recipients, we ask that you’ve first established some contact through correspondence, then both of you must complete an authorization form. To receive a copy of this form, e-mail Jean Frey.
Guidelines for initiating contact:
If you aren’t sure what to say, send a simple “thinking of you” card, ask them how they’re doing and wait for a response. Share the story of your loved one and feel free to give general information about occupations, interests, etc. Don’t include any identifying information, such as your last name, city, employer or name of the hospital where your family member donated.
On a separate piece of paper, list your full name, your loved one’s name, address and phone number. This will enable Gift of Life staff to pass your correspondence on to your family member’s recipients.
Mail your correspondence to:
Gift of Life Michigan
c/o Jean Frey
3861 Research Park Drive
Ann Arbor, MI 48108
Bereavement Resources & Support Groups:
Grieving is a complicated process, which everyone deals with differently. For some, spending time with others who also are in a period of bereavement can be helpful. For general grief counseling, Hospice of Michigan holds support group meetings statewide. Call 888.247.5181 to find a group near you.Support groups and reading materials:
- Compassionate Friends: This organization offers support, friendship and understanding to parents and siblings grieving the loss of a child. Contact: 877.969.0010.
- National Donor Family Council: This council of the National Kidney Foundation is made up of donor families, friends and professionals. It offers free resources to donor families. Contact: 800.622.9010.
- Living with Loss: This magazine is an excellent resource for those who are grieving.
- Grief Digest: This magazine provides a broad range of grief resources. Contact: 866.218.0101.
Grave markers and garden stakes available:
Donor mom, Jeanette Loeffler, wanted to do something to honor her son so she designed these metal stakes. They can be used to mark a grave or decorate a yard or garden in honor of a donor.The shorter, cast-iron marker is $15. The larger, white one stands three feet tall and is $30. Both are heavy so shipping is $20. If you're interested in ordering one, email Jeanette.
